Most people nowadays are aware of Trans women and the typical issues we face. Yet, what some people do not know is that our stories are all pretty much the same. Yes, there are variations in terms of timing, the support we get and our objectives, but our journeys all have similarities. Whether we are talking about a Trans-pinay from The Philippines or a Ladyboy from Thailand, you’ll find common ground. If you are thinking about T-girls from the UK or the US or one of the European countries, then you could almost substitute one girl’s name for another.
As I said, I like to look through the profiles on My Transgender Cupid. In fact, I have reached out to many of the other T-girls on the site to make friends. Some of them I have been corresponding with for over 6 months. I have learned a lot from them and their challenges and struggles. I also talk to many men as just friends, as I wish to know what makes them so interested in Trans women. On the other hand, I am “dating” two nice men right now and we hope to meet in the near future.
Maybe as I am a little older than most Transgender women on the site, my perspective and views may differ slightly from others of the younger generation. Younger T-girls have some advantages and some disadvantages if you compare them with the Trans women of my generation. And vice versa; we older Trans women do have some things in our favor!
In the past growing up Trans had different challenges
I won’t give my exact age away but if I say there was no internet available when I was younger, you can start to approximate my age. Of course, no internet meant no online dating sites. No YouTube or social media. It, therefore, meant it was very, very hard to find or learn about others with a similar interest in dressing in women’s clothes. Indeed, when I was young, I thought I was the only one out there whoever did such a thing.
Apart from there being no easily accessible channels to meet other Trans women, my situation was different from other T-girls for other reasons. Let me tell you some more about myself and my upbringing and you’ll see why.
I’m actually from the north of England but now live in London. The Transgender scene and the whole diversity scene is so much better in the capital. There is a full spectrum of people from the LGBTIQ community and beyond.
The journey of Transgender women moves at different paces
When I was growing up, as I said there was no internet and no way to find out about other Trans women. Local libraries were the best source of information but they certainly did not have any reference books about gay or Trans people. Like so many other T-girls I don’t know what got me started dressing up in women’s clothes. But I do recall one night when I was about 7 wearings a suspender belt and stockings in bed. However, I got caught by my mother when she came to say goodnight. This meant that my interest in female clothes and the opportunity came to a sudden end. That is, until I was about 13 or 14 when the opportunity presented itself to be alone for 3-4 days as my family vacationed.
For almost every hour of the time, I had to myself I dressed in my sister’s clothes. The whole range. Bras, panties, tights or stockings and skirts or dresses. I also dabbled with her make-up. Longish hair for boys was the fashion of the day so, by combing my hair in a female style I looked very much the young teen girl.
I was totally thrilled at being able to adapt my appearance so much. I had no idea I was a Transgender woman. In fact, the word was not in use. Still, I was what was then called Transsexual (I didn’t know this word either).
Honestly, I was very confused about my sexuality too. I loved girls and young women. It was only later in life that I realized that I didn’t know if I loved them for being feminine or because I longed to be like them.
And so this pattern kept on through my teen years and into my 20’s. The strong need to dress up and present as female, but often with long periods of time between opportunities to dress.
For me, it all became clearer as I was in my 30s. I realized that I had to make a choice. Tran news was all around by then and the internet was available. At last, I knew there were others like me. I went to a doctor who prescribed hormones, and less than 2 years later I started living full time as a female.
Almost the first thing I did after all of my surgeries were complete was to join MyTransgenderCupid. I felt I had a lot of lost time to make up! And, so, here I am. I know I made the right decision to transition and, of course, join this dating website!